surreal conversations

i sent the following message to the driver who is supposed to pick up our boss from the airport: "according to ana, fadi's flight will be delayed"

this conversation took place the following morning:

driver 1: "nikki, you send me a message yesterday?

nikki: "yes"

driver: "what does according mean?"

nikki: (medyo nabigla) "umm... according means ana said"

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another driver couldn't believe that our boss is only 27 years old. this was his reaction to the news...

driver: "no, i don't believe you sister!"

nikki: "it's true, his driver's licence says he is 27 years old."

driver: "don't believe passport or driver's licence, you just look at the face. his face says he is 35 years old."

(biglang tinging ang driver sa opisina ng aming amo)

driver: "is he inside?"

nikki: "no. why?"

driver: "because i'm thinking he might hear me."

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staff: "nikki put this car in the garage."

nikki: "what's wrong with this car?"

staff: "just tell them service and routine check up. also tell them that engine is over racing"

nikki: "over racing?"

staff: "yes. you know car goes vrooom vrooom when you step on pedal but it should not be."

nikki: (hindi ko pa rin ma-gets) "ok"